Hogzilla: Dear God, make me a bird…

So I can fly far, far away don’t have to run anymore.

Why did I think this was a good idea? If I had forgotten about the 76 extra pounds that I’ve been carrying around for a while, then I remembered them last night. If I had forgotten how much I hated running during my years as a basketball, softball and yes TRACK athlete…then I remembered last night.

Oh yes. I remembered. And I found myself begging for a dark cornerso I could curl up into the fetal position and cry myself to sleep.

But I did the training session…and then some.

My friends Birdrunner and Sandra have generously offered to meet with me 2 days a week to train. And I love them for that because when I know I’m meeting someone, I will go. If I’m left to my own devices, I’ll talk myself out of exercising more often than not.

Here’s the thing: both women are way ahead of me on the fitness scale. Sandra has 1 full marathon under her belt and 7 or 8 halfs. Birdrunner has done too many to count. And even if they say they need to lose a few (a very few) pounds, they are MILES ahead of me <–(see what I did there? Miles ahead? I’m so damn clever) in the training world. Seriously, their walking pace is faster than my ‘jogging’ pace. What I do is faux-jogging.

We did 3.8 miles last night. (can I round it up to 4 miles even?) I did the 30 minute Couch to 5K workout which wound up being 2 miles. (15 minute mile is pretty good to start out with for me) Then we walked back to the house with a jog or two sprinkled in there. Basically we did the 4 3.8 miles in under an hour which I felt pretty good about.

Even if my legs and feet were cussing up a storm. Along with my mouth.

I really liked the new Cto5K workout. The music was right up my alley. But every time Suz said ‘it’s time to run’ a ‘fuck off’ accidentally slipped out of my mouth. (no offense to Suz) Seriously. It hurt yesterday. Badly. But I did it.

And Birdrunner and Sandra were quite patient with me. They kept their pace which I would say was a 1/4+ mile ahead of me. When I would faux-jog I would inch closer to them, but by the time we were ‘briskly’ walking home, they pulled ahead of me again. Because brisk is how I like my tea, not my walking. Especially when I had just faux-jogged off and on for 30 minutes.

But I did it. I completed my first week of training. I think I’m going to have to move to a 4 day a week running schedule because I have so far to go. At this rate, I will NOT be able to run a 5K in December because I am struggling to run 60 seconds. I’m actually dreading next week’s increase, but hopefully I’ll get through it.

I REALLY want to do this. And I am proud of myself for getting through Week 1. But let me tell you, right now the idea of running 13 miles makes me want to chop my feet off. 13 seems impossible, since I was struggling so badly yesterday. Hell, running 1 mile seems impossible right now.

But to quote my favorite Space Ship Captain: Never give up. Never surrender.

Tags: ouch