You are surfing posts written on February 7th, 2014

7 Feb 2014
Categorized As: fitness, gear, Hogzilla

boobs-e-card

Hey ladies! If you’ve got big boobs and you cannot lie…tell me, doesn’t running suck?

I love my Krakens. I really do. They are things of art. They make me want to believe in a higher power. My cleavage makes the gods weep.

But let’s face it, trying to strap down these 38Gs so that I can get my workout on, is damn near impossible.

I’ve tried it all. I’ve used the two harness method. The duct tape (not even joking) method. Buying the 1 size too small and breaking my ribs method. Nothing really works. Well, that’s not true, the one size smaller smoosh-em-down-into-a-uni-boob method does work, it’s just so unattractive. And painful. And no, I’m not worried about how I look when I’m getting my wog on, but let me tell ya. The uni-boob will still put an eye out.

So today, I invested in a sports bra that was designed for Krakens.  I read a couple of good reviews from really large breasted athletes. What sold me on this bra? One reviewer said her rack looked amazing in the bra and it was comfortable. AND it worked. SOLD! Thank you Amazon Prime for free 2-day shipping!

I meet with my personal trainer tonight. I hope I like him. The last guy I met with through my gym was a total douchenozzle. He thought he was charming and funny and motivating, but he wasn’t. At. All.

This will be interesting for sure. I definitely have started the day off right, carbing up for my workout with biscuits and gravy and a donut. People who say “No food tastes as good as skinny feels” must have no taste buds.

Happy Friday, bitches! Get off your ass this weekend a move it, move it!