Funny how CK is trying to blame me for her CA Marathon Medal obsession. All I did was call her and kevetch about being a lazy ass while all these people were running around me and decided right then I should train for a marathon. CK is the one who jumped all in and decided […]
Dear girl with the long flowing Barbie hair and perfect round ass–you have replaced Hawiian Tropic bitch as person I hate most at the gym. At least have the decency to put your long, flowing, wavy, blonde locks in a pony tail, Barbie Hair Girl. Dear girl with the man shoulders. You and your man […]
So the book is done mostly done. Monday was a terrible day and it was a fantastic day all at once. I wrote 52 pages in one day. Let me tell you, that is a miracle in and of itself. One should not inflect that kind of stress on one’s brain though because it has […]
Dear New Year’s Resolution Gym Goers, Get the fuck out of my gym. Seriously. Now look, I’m not trying to discourage you from your fitness goal. I promise. But do you all have to go at the exact same time? Do you know what the gym smells like when every one of the machines are […]
Continue reading about Hogzilla: an open letter to the resolved
Had a head full of snot this morning. No gym. Fought a sinus headache all day–no gym this afternoon. I do feel better now. I’ll go tomorrow.
Continue reading about Hogzilla: apparently not THAT dedicated
I must be dedicated to this here fitness thing because this morning, at 4:45 AM I was on my way to the gym. 45 mins of cardio and 30 mins of weights and abs…and I was finished before the chickens were even awake. I did this because I start my new part-time job today. I’ll […]
Workout was good today. Sorta. I did 45 mins on the elliptical, but I was on one of the older machines that I don’t like. The pedals are set a little further apart and I look like I’m running with a corncob stuffed up my nether region. It isn’t pretty. Now that I’ve done 45 […]
First of all, I’m -10 lbs this morning. Yes, that’s right. I’m down 10 lbs. During the holidays. Go ahead, bask in my glory. That means I get to order a new CD. What’s it gonna be? I went to the gym this morning and conquered another 45 minutes on the elliptical, then weights and […]
I did 45 mins on the elliptical today–half of that time a pretty steep incline. I thought I was sweating the other day? No. Today I thought I would wash away. No lady should have have sweat dripping down her butt crack. Just sayin. And what is with these sweaty palms of mine? Seriously, I […]
Was HARD. I didn’t eat much yesterday. Did drink a bunch little bit. I woke up this morning feeling great but I had to talk myself into going to they gym. I went. I didn’t love it. It was hard. 3 miles in 35.24. The last mile was hard. Very hard. I did 2 miles […]